ED tried to control my chronic pain

I have had fibromyalgia and chronic pain since I was in my early 20’s. I also started binge eating in my early 20’s. I thought that eating would help me feel better when I was in physical pain. I wanted it to numb the physical pain. I was wrong. The older I got the more I binged, the more I binged the more weight I gained, and the more it contributed to my chronic pain. I became “morbidly obese”. I was always overweight in my 20’s, but never “morbidly obese”. The pain got worse. The doctors would call me “fat” and tell me to lose weight and exercise. It was all about the weight. They never realized I had an eating disorder. They never asked what contributed to my “morbid obesity”. Not until last year when I was finally diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder. I mentioned it to a doctor who finally listened and believed me. I would eat packages of cookies and chips at a time, when everyone was sleeping. I would starve myself all day and then eat triple portions at dinner.

The physical pain was the worse it had ever been and ED contributed to it because of the weight I have gained due to the bingeing. I knew it was bad when I had to use a driving cart on a trip to Disney World because I was in so much pain to walk around the park. I was so embarrassed and ED was right there telling me it was ok, just eat to feel better.

Since treatment, I am not bingeing. I am

able to walk better due to some healthy weight loss. My pain is still there but I am going to counseling and physical therapy to deal with my pain. I am not letting ED control my response to my pain and I am trying to Kick ED’s Butt.🐷